VHS – The Celtic Diary

Celtic Multimedia | Media | About Celtic

Title: The Celtic Diary
Release Date: Dec 1996
Review By: Beyemystic August 2010

VHS - The Celtic DiaryA mid-season magazine style video produced during the ill-fated 1996-97 campaign. It was in fact advertised as "the first Celtic diary," but proved to be a one off – for reasons which will become abundantly clear.

The opening scene was entitled "New Bhoys" though this proved something of a misnomer, since two of the new Bhoys were Alan Stubbs and Paulo Di Canio, signed six months previously.

First a very uncomfortable-looking Stubbs talked the viewer through the shambolic start to his Celtic career. This was interspersed with Tommy Burns and Billy Stark giving another airing to the soundbites they had rehearsed the previous summer: he's a great passer, he can play in midfield, all the English teams wanted him etc. etc.

Then Di Canio, resplendent in lime-green sweater and denim shirt, declared himself happy with the club, fans and manager. After imparting these insights he promptly got out of his chair, blew a kiss to the camera and walked off set!

Next up – apparently tacked on as an afterthought – was Burns talking about the signing of Davie Hannah. Almost apologetically, Tommy assured fans he had tried for "real big names" to replace crocked McStay and O'Donnell before opting for Hannah.

Overall, the segment was bordering on excruciating. And it was downhill from there as, for some reason, next was extended highlights of a pre-season friendly. Celtic went into a 2-0 lead at home to a depleted Sporting Lisbon after the Portuguese sweeper Oceano Cruz was sent-off. However, lamentable defending allowed Sporting to pull level. This included a John Hughes own goal – or "an ogi from Yogi," as it was described.

While it was bizarre that a pre-season friendly should take up so much space on the tape, this was followed by yet more 'highlights' of another interminably dull game against ten-man opposition. This time it was the late, undignified, barrel-scraping win over Slovakian minnows Kosice in the UEFA Cup preliminary round. Oddly Hamburg's casual thrashing of Celtic in the next round was absent, save for Burns and Peter Grant voicing some vague ruminations about why Scottish teams were so pathetic in Europe at the time.

Were this soporific fayre not enough to have viewers reaching for the stop button, next was a brief feature on the youth team. Actually this bit wasn't too bad, featuring brief interviews with Willie McStay, Stewart Kerr and next-big-thing of the time, Barry Elliot.

Finally, Paul McStay spoke about his MBE and impending London trip to collect the bauble.

Although released in an age when the Internet was in its infancy, and information harder to come by, there is no excuse for the lazy, boring content of this video. In hindsight it must be considered a slap in the puss to any fans who forked out for it.

Product Details

Production year 1996
Running Time 57 mins